Lawyers, alcoholics and that "I don't do feelings" thing

Jan 14, 2022


Hello {{first_name}},

I received this message for you.

"Today we turn to accessing our own deep inner knowing. The voice we have ignored for so long but which is now yearning to come out. Ignoring it has made us feel doubtful of ourselves and constantly exhausted as we try to figure out from the mind what to do. Once we realise we are using only a fragment of our power, we are willing to move past the mind but it requires training for us to let go of this reliance on the mind. We have been conditioned to rely on the mind, it’s like taking a certain route to one’s home and then when we move home, the conditioning takes us automatically again towards the old house even though we know we live in a different part of town now.

As we move towards a new orientation, we access knowing from a different place. This requires us to be still. For many of us this is so difficult! Why? Because it requires us to be present with ourselves. This means all the feelings we habitually push away with busyness and overwork must be felt. This too, may seem daunting at first but in truth it is not. It is merely acquiring a new habit. As we learn that thoughts and feelings are not real, and that we can feel them and move on, we learn not to give so much power to our emotions.

Imagine a being that has never been allowed to feel, in some Orwellian state. Where one has to keep a brave face or a happy smiling face all the time, regardless of what is transpiring inside. This creates stifled emotions which only grow as they amplify to be heard. You have seen this in children crying out for attention. Children who are given attention, and who are able to attend to their own emotional needs, do not have tantrums - or barely any! Therefore you now need to pay attention to your emotional landscape. Not be consumed by it, but literally learn how to feel so that you can move to a state where you let emotions move through you, and then you are on the other side. This is a prerequisite for being able to tap into intuition.

Does this make sense now? To put it differently, there is a psychological component to the spiritual path. Currently these fields are considered separate. People embark upon psychological paths OR spiritual paths but you need to begin to see them as inextricably linked. For only when you have processed some of the emotions are you able to go deeper to that place where you connect with your soul.

Be patient with yourself. For many this journey is only just beginning and it can seem completely overwhelming. Learning how to feel is a tall order especially for ones who have created such steadfast patterns of avoiding the feelings! Yet as you learn that they move through you, you begin to allow them. And once you are in the process of allowing, it becomes so very much easier.

We wish you greater ease with the transitions taking place in the world right now.

The best way we can support you is to find more ease within yourself."

So that was a channeled message. I sit down and I hear the sentences forming in my head. It's a pretty cool skill. I wrote this the same way I do readings for clients, just by listening and writing what I hear. Maybe that takes some of the mystery out of it for you?

A book came to mind as I wrote it - so here:

Book recommendation

I found Untamed by Glennon Doyle very helpful as she has a talent at putting hard things into words. I'm sure I recommended it a little while ago. It came up again for me today! She's very funny but also makes her readers cry a lot. I identified with a lot of what Glennon shares about learning to feel in this book, because I too had a drug and alcohol addiction that completely took over my life, and left me broken, trying to start again at age 24.

This is what Glennon shares about feelings in one part of Untamed:

“After the meeting ended, a woman walked over and sat down next to me. She said, ‘thanks for sharing. I relate. I just want to tell you something that somebody told me in the beginning. It’s okay to feel all of the stuff you’re feeling. You’re just becoming human again. You’re not doing life wrong; you’re doing it right. If there’s any secret you’re missing, it’s that doing it right is just really hard. Feeling all your feelings is hard, but that’s what they’re for. Feelings are for feeling. All of them. Even the hard ones. The secret is that you’re doing it right, and that doing it right hurts sometimes.’

I did not know, before that woman told me, that all feelings were for feeling. I did not know that I was supposed to feel everything. I thought I was supposed to feel happy. I thought that happy was for feeling and that pain was for fixing and numbing and deflecting and hiding and ignoring.”

I'm sharing this because I don't think lawyers know how to feel either. Just like alcoholics, lawyers learned to numb their feelings with thinking and busyness and work, always work.

If you're finding the feeling part of life hard, you're not alone.

But you are in good company with other awakening lawyers and that's why we do hard things together.

I'm here for you.

 

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